A Life Update

 

by Jessica Jones

It's been a while since my last update, and I want to share with you what has been unfolding in my life recently - causing this latest hiatus. The past month or so has been particularly challenging and transformative, shaping not just my daily routines but also my emotional landscape.

I have embarked on a journey with Shady Grove Fertility after experiencing two losses in June and December of 2022. Since then, there hasn’t been a pregnancy, and the path my partner and I have had to navigate has been fraught with both hope and hurdles. The process is intensive—filled with numerous appointments, invasive diagnostic procedures, and an overwhelming amount of tests. The emotional toll it takes is indescribable, compounded by the necessity to be so exposed, both literally and figuratively.

This journey has meant being open in ways I find uncomfortable, especially as someone who values privacy. Every step feels all-consuming, leaving little room for the other aspects of my life. As many of you know, I strive for perfection in my work, and I've always found solace in reading, which I continue to use as my escape. Balancing these passions while being a present parent to my nearly four-year-old has been especially tough lately.

Recently, (as in it’s still going on) my son battled a double ear infection followed by a severe and frightening allergic reaction to amoxicillin, which manifested as erythema (or maybe urticaria?) multiforme (or maybe serum sickness?)—a type of rash that covered his entire body—and joint pain. It has been four agonizing days, and though the rash is starting to clear, the joint pain persists, adding to the emotional and physical toll of our current circumstances.

Amidst this, life's unpredictability has been starkly evident. I discovered a nail in my tire on the way to one of my fertility appointments. We had an emergency room scare with a loved one, which, thankfully, turned out okay. My husband was involved in a workplace accident; thankfully, he was unharmed and not at fault. Moreover, I witnessed a distressing accident where an out-of-control car crashed head on into the vehicle behind me on a bridge, narrowly missing my son and me.

Moreover, the financial implications of fertility treatments are substantial, and much of this process is beyond my control. The waiting—the sheer volume of unknowns after each test and procedure—can be paralyzing. We are currently exploring what our treatment options might be, which may include IUI or IVF, though we are uncertain about our emotional and psychological bandwidth for the latter.

In addition to everything else, we are also undergoing genetic counseling to better understand our situations and possible futures. The support of my family and friends during this time means the world to me, yet I cannot help but feel the weight of these experiences.

I want to thank you all for your understanding and patience as my posting schedule has been irregular. I am still here, still reading, and I will continue to share reviews and stories with you when I can. Your support during this time is invaluable to me.


 

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